{As I’ve posted before, I’m creating resolutions in honor of my recent 50th birthday that will inspire and guide me going forward.}

This resolution also has two meanings, like Be Light, and it’s related in a way as well. As I said in the Be Light post, I want to be a positive influence. I want to do good things in my life. I’m not necessarily thinking of huge things, but whenever I have a chance to do some good, like helping a person in need, I want to take it.

Part of this is keeping my eyes open for those chances. Often I’m all wrapped up in my own life and not really paying full attention to the world around me. It’s easy to miss opportunities to help others when I’m just focused on myself.

It also means choosing actions that will be helpful, rather than hurtful, to others. I want to act with integrity. I never want to harm another through my actions or words. And if I do hurt someone else (which inevitably happens, even when we don’t mean to), I want to step up and apologize immediately, and try to make it right. I want to own my actions rather than letting shame take over and cause me to justify or hide.

It’s hard to admit when I’ve made a mistake, especially if it hurt someone else. But it’s important to be honest and to give the other person a chance to tell me how they feel. It’s uncomfortable, but so much healthier than avoidance! And it’s simply the right thing to do if I want to live a “good” life.

The other meaning of this resolution is that I want to focus on being satisfied with “good” rather than “perfect.” Gretchen Rubin references the quote “Perfect is the enemy of good” in The Happiness Project, and this really struck a chord with me.

I spend way too much energy trying to do everything perfectly, when doing it “good enough” would be just fine. I want to lower some of my ridiculously high standards and, as I’ve talked about before, give myself a break as much as possible. I think that will free up a lot of energy and time. This part may be harder to stick to, but it will really have a positive impact in the long term.

What do you think about the idea of “good” being OK, or even preferable, to “perfect”? Here is an interesting article from Entrepreneur magazine that goes into the concept a little further. And in the spirit of this idea, I’m going to wrap this post up here, rather than attempt to create the perfect ending! :-)

Here is Part 2 of the list of books I’ve read during my search for joy that have guided me along my path. (See Part 1 here.)

The Artist’s Way and The Vein of Gold, Julia Cameron: incredible resources for anyone who wants more creativity and authenticity in their lives, whether you’re an “artist” or not. Her tone is calming and supportive, and her tools and exercises really work.

In The Artist’s Way she introduces morning pages, where you write longhand, stream of consciousness, for three pages first thing each morning. This clears the “sludge” out of the mind and can also help you identify fears and issues that are holding you back. Another tool is the artist date, where you take yourself somewhere creatively inspiring each week.

In addition, she outlines a 12-week program designed to help you break through any creative blocks and rediscover your true self and what you want to do. It’s amazing. Many of the women I interviewed for my book on morning rituals mentioned this book and how transformative it had been for them.

The Vein of Gold takes you further along the” journey to the heart of creativity” and provides new exercises that are designed to “engage the reader in inner play.”

How We Choose to Be Happy, Rick Foster and Greg Hicks: they interviewed extremely happy people and found that often they were happy not because of their circumstances, but in spite of them. They CHOSE to be happy and accomplished this by setting that intention and looking for the positive in whatever happened to them. This shows that it’s not the external things that make us happy, but how we feel inside and how we perceive our lives. That’s why being a millionaire doesn’t automatically make someone happy. The authors were able to identify nine choices that all of the people had made that accounted for their happiness, and they discuss those. It’s a fascinating read.

A Short Guide to a Happy Life and Being Perfect, Anna Quindlen: these deceptively small books pack a punch! Her writing is elegant and straightforward, and a pure joy to read. A Short Guide is an eloquent reminder to cherish each moment and appreciate the richness of our everyday lives.

Being Perfect rocked my world when I first read it. It’s full of brilliant insights about “the perfection trap,” which I often find myself caught in. She encourages us to be ourselves rather than constantly strive to live up to others’ expectations. These quotes really hit home for me: “Eventually, being perfect became like carrying a backpack filled with bricks every single day” and “What is really hard, and really amazing, is giving up on being perfect and beginning the work of becoming yourself.” Yes!

How to Live a Good Life, Jonathan Fields: this is a very practical and easy-to-follow book that gives concrete recommendations on how to create a more fulfilling, engaged, happier life. He breaks life up into three “Good Life Buckets”: vitality (the state of your mind and body), connection (relationships), and contribution (how you contribute to the world). He says, “The fuller your buckets, the better your life. When all simultaneously bubble over, life soars. That’s what we’re aiming for. But the flip side is also true. If any single bucket runs dry, you feel pain. If two go empty, a world of hurt awaits. If all three bottom out, you don’t have a life. Figuratively and, in short order, literally.”

He gives a “60-second snapshot” to determine the levels in each of your buckets, and then the following chapters describe 10 ways to fill each bucket. Fields also runs The Good Life Project, which offers courses, podcasts, and even a summer camp for adults every year in upstate New York.

The Happiness Project, Gretchen Rubin: this was probably the first book I read that was specifically on looking for ways to be happier. It is also a very practical and easy-to-follow book, about how the author spent a year “test-driving the wisdom of the ages, current scientific research, and lessons from popular culture about how to be happier” after realizing that she was wasting her life in a sort of malaise. She had reasons to be happy, but often didn’t feel happy, so she decided to dedicate a year to trying out different ways to boost her happiness. Rubin is an excellent, engaging writer and it’s a fun read with lots of interesting ideas to try.

The Miracle of Mindfulness and Peace Is Every Step, Thich Nhat Hanh: simply reading his books makes me feel peaceful. His style is so restful—it’s like meditating while reading. And his concepts are simple yet incredibly powerful. If you find meditating or mindfulness difficult, like I do, these books will be very helpful.

I hope that one or more of these books makes a difference for you, as they have for me. Stay tuned for Part 3!